1. You learn to eat with your left hand.
2. Your feet become hands.
3. Sex has to go on the “To Do” list or you’ll forget.
4. It’s an obstacle course trying to move around to avoid squeaky floors.
5. You only wear clothes that can get dirty. If you wear your good clothes you are brave!
6. You can do anything with just one hand.
7. Going to the grocery store is your form of a break.
8. You smell of baby puke.
9. You don’t change your shirt they just threw up on because they’ll just do it again.
10. You plan your day around their sleep/feeding time.
11. Frustration quickly fades as soon as they smile at you.
12. You check on them constantly to make sure their breathing.
13. You think you hear your baby’s cries when their not around.
14. Your purse is your baby’s diaper bag.
15. You’ve mastered putting the baby’s pacifier in their mouth from the driver’s seat without looking back.
16. Your ears become really sensitive.
17. Sniff your baby’s butt to make sure she hasn’t pooped or stick your finger in the diaper to make sure she isn’t wet. Yes I do this!
I could say this for the dad’s too, but come on, how many of them do all of them???
Baby Z’s dad still has not figured out how to use only one hand! God forbid I ask him to hand me something haha. He surely doesn’t care about stepping on squeaky floors either. Also, it doesn’t matter if Baby Z wakes up in the middle of the night wailing or not, he doesn’t wake up to that either. Mother’s know best and can deal with everything way better. At least the daddy’s try.